Random thoughts!

I wanted to become a good writer ever since I came in the call center industry. My friend Mimi inspired me to start writing. It started as a requirement just so I can start earning from it then it became a hobby. Now all I wanted is to be good at it. I was hoping to look for a school or a site where I can learn so I can improve on my flaws. I was kinda hoping that someday I will be good in this. Well, I don’t have plans on writing a book or to practice writing but I am starting to feel like this could be my passion, something I like doing so might as well be good at it.

I am planning to go to school again once I find time. I just don’t know yet where to study. I am also planning to learn a new language, Spanish probably. Hopefully in time I can do all this. Help me God!

End of Team Joice?

The day we all been dreaded has come. Today, the management made it official that the whole Team Joice should now be dispersed. First it was TL Joice who left us because she needs to handle a new team from transition. After she left, our team’s performance became a bit unstable and in the end their impression is that we are not performing. As we all explained, we are still doing the same thing that we’ve been doing since we rank top team and yet they say that we need to be dispersed because our relationship amongst the team members is not healthy anymore. We were given some time to catch up and make up for the times we’re down but we just got unfortunate not to meet that targets they’ve set.

And so they won.

They scattered us to different team, lucky me I will be joined by Ayi and Omar. Too bad Eric and Jana and the rest of Malditas will be on a different teams. I always think that we will be able to accept this fact in time. But most of them said that they will immediately send their letter of resignation once we are out of the team. That’s what’s breaking my heart. I already found comfort with these bunch and them all of a sudden everyone will leave?

In the mean time, I got accepted as a new QSP intern so I won’t be joining Ayi and Omar yet. Mami Dheng already transferred to CVG San Lazaro. The rest is a in their respective teams now. I just hope everyone will stay and everyone will find home in their new teams. Surely this won’t be the end of our team. Even after the dispersal, I still feel we are in a team, we are a family.

Getting there!

Just this morning QSP Cris Arceo sent me a message in Yahoo Messenger about the result of the interview. He told me that I made it. He said that I will be assisting the transition team of TL PJ Bolos. Their shift is at 10:30PM and my rest days will be Sunday-Thursday (split off/loser’s off). Well the next thing I know is that my hands were covering my mouth out of shock. This is so not happening. This can’t be true; there must be some sort of a mistake.

So I asked him again and he showed me the email he got which has my new schedule. Only then I realized that it is indeed true. I made it! Oh well so much for the excitement but I am starting to feel some chills filling me in. I am afraid on what’s going to happen next but I am so much thrilled on what I can get from this. The experience and exposures will definitely something worth having.

One thing I am very much afraid of is being far from my beloved team. They are the reason why I stayed further and look at me now, leaving them. Like what I have said before in my previous blogs, I was at the verge of leaving the company until I became friends with this people who are so infectious with sheer positivity. I know they will understand if I take a different route for now, anyway we will see each other after the internship. On the other hand, I will see my old friends often since I’ll be in the night shift. Mimi and my other friends are there to be back me up in the absence of my team.

Whatever happens to me during internship, I hope it will do me good and I hope I’ll have fun!

War against Oily skin

Fighting Oily Skin topic is what I really hate to tackle here. I promised myself I will only come up to an article as such if I have completely treated mine. Ever since I became a teenager, I started having a greasy, thick, heavy and super oily skin. I tried using numerous products that promised to help treating my condition but none of them seemed work. A friend once told me to seek professional advice from a dermatologist but that would be very pricey so I am starting to save some money. Just so I make my time productive (this is with regard to my oily skin issue), I searched the net and checked some remedies that could probably help me cure this condition. I came across a lot of pages that suggests products to use and what-to-do’s to improve my case.

I was under the impression that if you have an oily skin, you shouldn’t be using any moisturizers because they will make your skin oilier. Man I was wrong. I read to some articles saying that if one has oily skin, he/she should still have to use a moisturizer. You just have to be careful in choosing one. As advised by the author, a person with oily skin should only use mild or water based moisturizer. You see the reason why your skin secretes sebum or oil is because your skin is too dry it needs to be moisturized. So a light moisturizer would greatly help.

Rest plays an important role in our skin. Aside from the fact that complete rest gives us the energy to go on the day, eight hours of sleep will make our skin healthy as well. According to that same article that I read, our oil glands are most active when we lack of sleep.

I have seen some products over the net that were recommended by the authors of the article as they contain some of the chemicals that you need to improve your condition. I don’t think you can blame me if I get a bit skeptical about this because again I have tried many products that didn’t do much help in my condition. However, I have to single out the product called Cetaphil. I heard good feedbacks from the users of this product so I guess I would have to try that. But aside from Cetaphil, I won’t be using other products unless recommended by the dermatologist.

Another thing that affects our skin would be the food that we eat. As suggested by many, we should only eat food that’s good to our health. Eating fruits and veggies not only can make you feel good but will make you look good. Remember, we are what we eat. Stop eating junk foods or fatty foods. Let us all live a healthy living.

The Interview

Just this morning I was informed that I was able to pass the test. It came to me as a surprised, really. Two of us made it. Mommy Dheng too was able to pass. I really thought I won’t make since during the examinations I did nothing but laugh as if I was just goofing around.

What exactly happened is that during the start of my shift which was at 4:30am, I learned that I passed the examinations. My in-team OIC informed me that the interview will be held this coming Saturday. Good for me I have enough time to prepare for the interview (which is what I am looking forward to). I am so much trilled to be interviewed. It’s been a while since I last had a serious interview.

At around 10:30am QSP Cris Arceo came to me and said “Prepare yourself! You’ll have your interview anytime soon”. I was confused so I asked “like how soon?” . He said “Like around 11 or 12 today!”. He left me with my mouth wide opened. I was in a complete shock.

I was dead nervous, yes. I won’t deny it, I mean who’s not be pressured when the news came in a very short notice. I pull myself together and stand. I took my lunch first and think things over. Harold, my in-team OIC talked to both us (Dheng and I). He gave us tips on what are the normal questions being asked during the interview and the best answer you can use.
At around 12nn, they ask me to go to the huddle room since the interviewers were already waiting. My heart was beating really fast as if I was having bad asthma. The next thing I knew is that I was sitting in front of four people with the smile on their faces. I took a deep breath and just wear my best smile. All that I have in mind is that what I am doing right now will all be charged to experience. I just answered all of their questions as honest as I can. The interview was a mixture of simple and tough questions. I guess the toughest one was the role playing. It made me nuts! You don’t want to know what was the role playing about. Let’s not talk about it anymore.

I don’t want to keep my hopes up so I am not expecting that they’ll get me. If you’re going to ask me, I giggled most of the time during the interview. I took it not too seriously; it was as if I am having a plain conversation with the interviewers. Oh well, as I have said before, whatever the result be, I will charge it all to experience. Good luck to me! *wink

Failed Attempts

Lately, I've been searching for that first chance in love. God knew how I longed to experience the "feeling". I have my own story to tell about the ups and downs about my journey in this so called search. Before, my attempts will end with just merely texting or chatting guys over the net but lately, I was able to go out with them. That I guess was already something, well for me. I had few attempts that failed but the recent one was most terrible.

I got strayed on this certain site where gay people as well as bisexual guys search for partners. It is somehow similar to Facebook but here there are no female or straight guy users. I stumble across this profile of an interesting guy. I didn't let the chance pass so I initiated a conversation, I send him a message. And so we started talking.

It's been two weeks since we started exchanging text messages. During those times we've been too comfortable to one another that we call each other "babe". We talked a lot; we tackled a lot of topics that both of us are familiar with like love, music, school, TV and even sex. I was surprised that I was able to maximize or even exceeded this certain promo of Globe about 100 text messages. We also did video calls thru yahoo messenger. I was afraid he might lose interest in me after seeing my actual look thru web camera but he didn’t. It was a great relief knowing that this person was not judging you thru your physical look. He was able to accept me as me.

Everything was going smooth and we were planning to meet up soon but things get a bit shaky after what happened yesterday. I was texting him that morning and was not able to receive any reply so I thought he doesn’t have any credits left to make a reply which was okay for me. I was shocked by the text message I received that afternoon while I was with my friends.

Unknown: Can you please stop texting at this number? 0905 - XXX-XXXX hindi ka na nga tinetext, text ka pa ng text!
Me: Ha?? Cno ka?!
Unknown: Boyfriend nya! Asawa nya! Buhay nya!
(I texted him and said “Babe kaninong number to 0916 - XXX-XXXX, inaaway nya ako!)
Unknown: Nagtetext ka pa na inaaway kita? Pathetic!! Bye!
Me: There must be some mistake. I was not informed that he’s already committed.
Unknown: Oh ngayong alam mo ng meron siyang lover, siguro naman lulubayan mo na? Ilugar mo mukha mo!!
Me: Sana di mo naman ako inaaway. So much for the respect! For your peace, I’ll stop. Better ask him first what happened. And for clarity’s sake, we are not together yet. Again I was not informed that he is already committed. If I knew then I wont waste my time with him. I’m the victim here okay!
Unknown: Kayo ba?
Me: Hindi po. Pero I have to admit I have a special feeling for him. I thought that there is something special going on between the two of us. Pero I guess I have to stop this.
Unknown: Ano sinasabi nya sayo?? Nagmeet na ba kayo?
Me: Di pa kame nagmimeet. Can you just ask him na lang. Im so over this.
Unknown: Sinabi ban yang gusto ka nya?
--I didn’t send any reply to this one just to keep things low. I don’t what to hear anything he has to say, I just want to think things over. I just wanted to be alone.

**I texted him and said “IM DONE WITH YOU!”

Well, I don’t think I deserve to be humiliated like that. I was furious; it felt really weird. I felt like a hand was crushing my heart that my chest pains like hell. It’s as if a spear just hit me. My feet were trembling and it felt like I can’t walk anymore. I’m hurt. I’m in pain. I didn’t even bother to look at my phone. I don’t want to see anymore messages, I’ve had enough. However, it was weird that that night I was able to fall asleep right away.

The next morning, he texted me again..

Him: Good morning!
Me: wag mo na ako itext. Baka awayin pa ko ng lover mo!!
Him: huh? Anong lover?
Me: bakit di ka nagtetext saken kahapon? Kanino tong number na to 0916 - XXX-XXXX?
Him: ala kasi akong load.
Me: kanino yung number na yun?
Him: Bakit? Ano ba sinabi sayo?
Me: sagutin mo ko!! Kanino yung number na yun?
Him: ala yun!
Me: bakit di mo ko masagot? At bakit alam nya yung mga messages ko sayo?
Him: siguro nabasa nya sa cellphone ko. Wag mo na lang pansisn yun. Let’s continue what we’ve started.
Me: di ko lang kasi maintindihan, sino ba siya? At bakit sinasabi nya na bf mo siya? Alam mo bang inaway nya ako?? Napahiya ako dun! Ang alam ko kasi single ka!
Him: wag ka na lang maguluhan. Ano ba mga sinabi nya sayo?
Me: single ka ba talaga? I want an honest answer!!
Him: I’m in a relationship right now!
Me: aww.. eh anu pla tayo? Para mo akong sinampal!! I think we should stop this!
Him: No, I think we should continue this.
Me: ha? Are you insane?! I don’t want to step on somebody else’s toes!! Kung gusto mo to ituloy, siguraduhin mong single ka!!
Him: wag naman ganun.
Me: HA?! Ano palang plano mong gawin?! Sabay kame?
Him: hindi po! Text mo ko kapag nakauwi ka na.
Me: ang gulo mo kausap!! Kausapin mo ko kapag alam mo na gagawin mo!
Him: am sorry kung nasaktan kita baby! Di ko naman sinasadya eh. Sana di ka magalit saken, ayaw ko kasing magalit ka.
Me: sa totoo lang sobrang sama ng loob ko sayo! Umasa ako na okay ka. Aaminin ko, gusto kita! Pero nasaktan mo na din kasi ako. Sabi mo saken di ka pa nagkakaBF, tapos ngayon sasabihin mo na in a relationship ka?! Siguro yung nagtext saken kahapon yun yung BF mo. Text ako ng text di ka nagrereply tas magugulat na lang ako, aawayin ako ng lover mo. Napahiya ako ng sobra!
Him:…
Me: wag mo na akong i-text. Ayoko makasira ng relasyon! Pls delete my number!!
Him: ganun ba? Sure ka ba?
Me: anong gusto mong gawin ko? Ituloy to ng meron kang iba? Tama bay un?
Him: hindi po. Gusto po kita makasama at makilala. Ayaw mo na ba saken?
Me: naririnig mo ba sarili mo!! MAY BF KA NA! mali kung itutuloy naten to!
Him: hindi po. Ayaw mo nab a saken?
Me: tulad ng sabi, gusto kita. Pero din a pwede dahil may BF ka na!
Him: walang mali pag gusto mo.
Me: eh yung BF mo, mahal mo siya diba?
Him: siguro ayaw mo lang talaga!!
Me: wag mong ibaling saken to!! Dahil ikaw ang may mali. Unang una, nagsinungaling ka!!
Him: hindi ko na din po alam,
Me: tama na! wag mo na din alamin. Ang gulo mo magisip! Tama na cguro!! Hanggang dito na lang tlga.
Him: sure ka na ba baby? :’(
Me: OO. Sorry but we have to end this. Unless you make yourself free, that’s when you can have me!

That night his lover texted me again..
Unknown: Nagmumukha ka ng tanga, stop texting my lover. Pinagtatawanan ka lang!

I never replied on that message and I deleted his number as well. I don’t deserve to be treated his way. I never cried, I didn’t want to shed a single drop of tear on this issue. Anyway, I haven’t invested too much emotion or love on him. I haven’t met him yet so I am not that attached to him that much. Good thing I have my friends beside me. They helped me cope up with this faster than finishing two cups of rice. Haha

Fighting singlehood has never been this difficult. Just when I thought this time is my turn to be loved, he I am, walking all alone. I feel so betrayed, I am hurt and I am lonely. I know this one taught me a great lesson. I know love is just around the corner. Maybe it’s not yet my time.